The Bush Administration announced each one of us would get a $600 tax rebate. It was supposed to be $800, but they dropped it to a $600.
There are other amounts depending on one’s individual circumstances.

However, if we spend that money at Wal-Mart, all the money will go to China .

If we spend it on gasoline it will all go to the Arabs, and neither will help the American economy.

We need to keep that money here in America , so the only way I can see to keep that money here at home is to buy beer, spend it on prostitution or play golf, as those are the only thriving businesses still in the U.S.A.

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The first vehicle to stop was an old man in a van. He yelled out the
Window, "Need a lift?"

"Yes, I sure do," I replied.

"You a Republican or Democrat," asked the old man.

"Republican," I replied.

"Well, you can just go to Hell," yelled the old man as he sped off.

Another guy stopped, rolled down the window, and asked me the same question.

Again, I gave the same answer, "Republican."
The driver gave me the finger and drove off.

I thought it over and decided that maybe I should change my strategy, since this area seemed to be overly political and there appeared to be few Republicans.
The next car to stop was a red convertible driven by a beautiful blonde.

She smiled seductively and asked if I was a Republican or Democrat.

"Democrat!" I shouted.

"Hop in" replied the blonde.

Driving down the road, I couldn’t help but stare at the gorgeous woman in the seat next to me, the wind blowing through her hair, perfect breasts, and a short skirt that continued to ride higher and higher up her thighs.

Finally, I yelled, "Please stop the car."

She immediately slammed on the brakes and as soon as the car stopped, I jumped out.

"What’s the matter?" she asked.

"I can’t take it anymore," I replied. "I’ve only been a Democrat for
five minutes and already I want to screw somebody."

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An old country preacher had a teenage son, and it was getting
time the boy should give some thought to choosing a
profession.

Like many young men, the boy didn’t really know what he
wanted to do, and he didn’t seem to concerned about it.
One day, while the boy was away to school, his father decided
to try an experiment. He went into the boy’s room and placed
on his study table four objects.
A bible
A silver dollar
A bottle of whisky
And a playboy magazine.

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An archeological team, digging in
Washington DC , has uncovered
10,000 year old bones and fossil remains
of what is believed to be the first
Politician.

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