10. When you begin to laugh you yell, LOL.

9. You tell your computer you love it, more than you tell your spouse.

8. Your house catches on fire and you run home to save your computer before your family.

7. Your computer is your ONLY friend.

6. You think cyber sex is better than real sex.

5. You type only in short hand (YO ROFLMAO I’LL BRB B4 U RTFM LOL).

4. You type 40 words a minute with two fingers.

3. Your twins are named RAM & ROM.

2. After breaking from your computer, you realize you have gained 40lbs, have grown hair in unusual places, your spouse and kids have left you, and Windows 98 is outdated.

1. YOU READ STUFF LIKE THIS!

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* As soon as you delete a worthless file, you'll need it.

* Installing a new program will always mess up at least  one old one.

* You can't win them all, but you sure can lose them all.

* The likelihood of a hard disk crash is in direct  proportion to the value of the material that hasn't been  backed up.

* There are only two kinds of computer users: Those whose  hard disks have crashed, and those whose hard disks  haven't crashed *yet*.

* Anything can be made to work if you fiddle with it. If  you fiddle with a computer long enough, you'll break it.

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Three women were sitting around talking about their husbands’ performance as
a lover.

The first woman says “My Husband works as a marriage counselor. He always
buys me flowers and candy before we make love. I like that.”

The second woman says, “My husband is a motorcycle mechanic. He likes to
play rough and slaps me around sometimes. I kinda like that.”

The third woman just shakes her head and says, “My husband works for
Microsoft. He just sits on the edge of the bed and tells me how great it’s going to be when I get it.”

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1. The monitor is up on blocks.

2. Outgoing faxes have chewing tobacco stains on them.

3. The six front keys have rotted out.

4. The extra RAM slots have dodge truck parts stored in them.

5. The numeric key pad goes up to six.

6. The password is Bubba.

7. There is a gun rack mounted on the CPU.

8. There is a Skoal can in the CD ROM drive.

9. The keyboard is painted camouflage.

10. The mouse is referred to as a “Critter”

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