A nun, badly needing to use the restroom, walked into a local Hooters.

The place was hopping with music and loud conversation and every once in a while the lights would turn off. Each time the lights would go out, the place would erupt into cheers.

However, when the revelers saw the nun, the room went dead silent. She walked up to the bartender, and asked, "May I please use the restroom."

The bartender replied, "OK, but I should warn you that there is a statue of a naked man in there, wearing only a fig leaf."

"Well, in that case, I’ll just look the other way," said the nun.

So the bartender showed the nun the way to to the bathroom.

After a few minutes, she came back and & the whole place stopped just long enough to give the nun a round of applause.

She went to the bartender and said, "Sir, I don’t understand.

Why did they applaud for me, just because I went to the restroom?"

"Well, now they know your’ re one of us," said the bartender,

Would you like a drink? It’s on the house."

"No thank you, but, I still don’t understand," said the puzzled nun.

"Well sister laughed the bartender, every time someone lifts the fig leaf on that statue, the lights go out.

Now, how about that drink?"

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My Dear Family,
The other day I went up to a local Christian bookstore and saw a honk if you love Jesus bumper sticker. I was feeling particularly sassy that day because I had just come from a thrilling choir performance, followed by a thunderous prayer meeting, so I bought the sticker and put in on my bumper.

I was stopped at a red light at a busy intersection, just lost in thought about the Lord and how good He is and I didn’t notice that the light had changed. It is a good thing someone else loves Jesus because if he hadn’t honked, I’d never have noticed.

I found that LOTS of people love Jesus. Why, while I was sitting there, the guy behind started honking like crazy, and when he leaned out of his window and screamed, "for the love of God, GO! GO!" What an exuberant cheerleader he was for Jesus.

Everyone started honking! I just leaned out of my window and started waving and smiling at all these loving people. I even honked my horn a few times to share in the love. There must have been a man from Florida back there because I heard him yelling something about a sunny beach…

I saw another guy waving in a funny way with only his middle finger stuck up in the air. When I asked my teenage grandson in the back seat what that meant, he said that it was probably a Hawaiian good luck sign or something.

Well, I’ve never met anyone from Hawaii, so I leaned out the window and gave him the good luck sign back. My grandson burst out laughing, why even he was enjoying this religious experience.

A couple of the people were so caught up in the joy of the moment that they got out of their cars and started walking towards me. I bet they wanted to pray or ask what church I attended, but this is when I noticed the light had changed. So, I waved to all my sisters and brothers grinning, and drove on through the intersection.

I noticed I was the only car that got through the intersection before the light changed again and I felt kind of sad that I had to leave them after all the love we had shared, so I slowed the car down, leaned out of the window and gave them all the Hawaiian good luck sign one last time as I drove away.

Praise the Lord for such wonderful folks!

Love, Grandma.

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A man, while playing on the front nine of a complicated golf course became confused as to where he was on the course. Looking around, he saw a lady playing ahead of him.

He walked up to her, explained his confusion and asked her if she knew what hole he was playing. ‘I’m on the 7th hole,’ she replied, ‘and you are a hole behind me. So you must be on the 6th hole.’ He thanked her and went back to his golf.

On the back nine, the same thing happened and he approached her again with the same request. ‘I’m on number 14, and you’re still a hole behind, so you must be on the 13th hole.’ Once again he thanked her and returned to his play.

He finished his round and went to the clubhouse where he saw the same lady sitting at the end of the bar. He asked the bartender if he knew the lady. The bartender said that she was a sales lady and played the course often.

He approached her and said, ‘Let me buy you a drink in appreciation for your help I understand that you’re in the sales profession.

I’m in sales also. What do you sell?’
‘I’ll tell you, but you’re going to laugh,’ she replied.
‘No, I won’t.

‘Well, if you must know,’ she answered, ‘I work for Tampax.
With that, he laughed so hard he lost his balance and fell off the barstool.

‘See,’ she said. ‘I knew you’d laugh!
‘That’s not what I’m laughing at,’ he replied, ‘I’m a salesman for Preparation H, so I’m still a hole behind you.’

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